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hey everyone so I definitely took the
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loss of my my monitor my desktop pretty
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hard at the same time part of me was
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already accepting it I
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just I could see the pros and cons even
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just as soon as that monitor was broken
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it was like okay new approach
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so I have torn the place
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apart there's my broken monitor over
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here
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obviously going to the dumpster but I
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took my desktop I put it over in the
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corner over there it'll probably sit
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there for quite a while until I decide
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what to do with
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it I thought you know it gives me an
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opportunity to rethink this area over
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here cuz with the monitor on there and
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your keyboard and your mouse and just
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all your technology that's all this
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table could be used for I couldn't use
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it for anything else so couldn't help me
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during cooking or eating or you know
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just
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that was my office space and that's a
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lot of space in a space that's small to
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be using for one
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thing so I think I've reached acceptance
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I'm just going to tear all this stuff
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out going to move this table try to
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center it I'm going to try to take my
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solar and just line them up at the
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bottom that way it's just better
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balanced you know two of those batteries
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is 160 lbs total so it's like there's
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just a person standing there all the
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time I can can balance
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those I think that's probably a helpful
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thing to do and I just a lot of stuff
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can come out now my PlayStation won't
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work because I don't have a monitor for
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it
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so my PlayStation and my desktop they
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use the same
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monitor so that's what I'm doing
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I'm adjusting strategies I actually
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think
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that I mean I knew
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I embarked on this journey knowing there
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were a lot of things I'd have to give up
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and that was one of the things that I
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felt I would have to because of the
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power requirements I didn't expect to
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have it here um and I'm trying to live a
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different kind of life right so I just
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don't know that I feel like I need to
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let it
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go I don't know if it will affect some
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of my plans like I do want to have a
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gaming channel I have an excellent
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laptop it should do the job but it's not
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a desktop it's just not the same
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and I won't have I won't have my um my
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mic you know
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and definitely deal with a lot of noise
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in the camper I mean right now my
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dehumidifier is going the air
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conditioner is off I'm wearing this mic
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it works well for this but it doesn't I
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don't think it works so well for
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recording well I tried it it didn't I'm
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going to have to maybe maybe I can I
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mean obviously if it works for this
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should work for that right I'm going to
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sneeze I know there's something in this
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camper that is aggravating me um up here
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I broke that they should look like
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this I broke it I saw some yellow
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substance up there I was like is that
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mold is that an old beehive what is that
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like it was masking tape Beyond these
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weird lines of some kind of like
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adhesive or something on top of it
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that got left behind when they made this
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camper just ridiculous and it's in other
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events too I've seen it I don't know how
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I'm going to get that stuff out of
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there um totally lost my train of
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thought oh the sneezing
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like um when they changed the tires
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there was a dad Mouse in one of the
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wheels so that got me thinking you know
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I've never seen under this bed like you
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know that's just a big box I'd have to
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pry it open to look but I kind of want
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to what's under there now I know it's
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under everything else pretty much
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so
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something um Chad gbt told me about dust
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smes and they survive with humidity
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about
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50% so I mean if that's it I hope that's
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all it is just you made a fire it's at
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50 right now so I don't know it's not
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getting much
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lower it's very high here in
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Kentucky so I'm just
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embracing I'm embracing it I'm you know
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it is what it is I can't change it yeah
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I could go buy another monitor
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or but it
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just and my God I know it's the right
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decision I I love that desktop like
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that that is a hard thing to give up but
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I think that you have to sacrifice for
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this lifestyle if I had a bigger camper
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it'd be a different story but this is a
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small one and I need every inch of space
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I can get so this will actually in the
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long
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run so I'll get over it maybe someday I
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will be able to use it again even if
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it's a couple years from now that thing
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still won't be out of date cuz it is
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super state-ofthe-art that is kind of
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why it's so sad like I
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just I invested a lot of money and time
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into upgrading that thing and making it
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the best desktop that you could possibly
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have and I don't like the idea of it
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just sitting around not being
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used I could sell it maybe
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and that would definitely help so I'm
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going I have to get my stuff off of it
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you know I don't want to really pull the
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hard drives out to do that but might
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have to I have no way of you know
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accessing it otherwise
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so you know those are my thoughts today
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and that's where I am it's the weekend
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it's very busy here I was actually
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thinking about showing you guys like
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you'll tell me it's not because it's
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it's actually not there's quite a lot of
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empty sites but I'm actually holding a
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try tripod here I hope it's helping
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there's just a lot of people out there
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they're everywhere I mean look over
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there that site is always like that too
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t campers over here
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like so I'm not going down to the
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showers over there where all the people
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are just got to wait for them to
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leave I hope they all leave you know
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Sunday sometimes they don't so I know
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how I sound I love that people camping
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and all of that you know that I do I
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just really love my solitude and I just
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I just feel better when I'm by myself I
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really don't like it when there are
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people around me it just makes me really
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uncomfortable I don't know why I guess
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I'll have to explore that
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more maybe I could get over it a little
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bit I doubt it though because that is
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just the kind of personality I have just
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there
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just just I don't like it I don't want
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to be outside you know I don't you know
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I want to relevel this thing but I just
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want them to be gone first it's just
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that's how I
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feel
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and I do have that level mate Pro thing
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I just got to get level so that I can
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program that thing and then getting
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Level will be easy so you know all of my
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challenges are not none of them are
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insurmountable and I never thought they
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were I think that a lot of people
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misunderstand me because yeah I can have
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a bad day but that doesn't mean that
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I've given up or that I you know think
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it's too hard I think it's difficult
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because it is difficult you know so I
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don't
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know it's all good though
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so just going to chill in here for the
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weekend and then Monday I see my dentist
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think you guys might actually see me in
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teeth I was thinking about it because I
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will take them with me and so I have
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bottom dentures and then they have these
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top ones with they temporary ones and
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since I got implants put in in the top
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of my mouth um I think they might need
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to adjust those temporary ones before I
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can wear them but they cause a gag
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reflex so that's why I don't wear them
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and I got the implants
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because they can carve out a piece of
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the Denture that tends to cause a gag
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reflex and I might be able to wear them
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after that
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so I'm hopeful I'll see them Monday
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they'll just clean them up and then put
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this stuff on them that molds them to
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your mouth little better and I'll try
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wearing them
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because
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I you know I've been doing this for 3
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months without teeth so obviously I am
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comfortable with who I am I'm I'm
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not so uncomfortable that I won't do it
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but everybody would like to to have
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teeth I think I look nice they're
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actually very nice looking
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um I
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just also it would be nice to be able to
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eat more things like I would love to
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have like nuts and things like that or
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even chips like I can't really eat any
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type of snack food that's probably what
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keeps me from gaining weight cuz snack
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food you pretty much need teeth for that
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Ba's over here rubbing it against this
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thing hi Bailey do you need
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attention oh another thing so I'm
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quitting
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smoking I have a few cigarettes left but
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I'm quitting I'm going to put a patch on
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and I'm going to just vape
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and I really hope I'm successful this
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time I feel like I feel like I'm ready
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so I think so because I was really
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thinking about it yesterday and then
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with all the stress I stopped vaping and
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started smoking so I don't know I have
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to be very firm with myself I think if I
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wear a
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patch then just Vape that maybe that
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will be enough to get me started I'm
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going to try it's worth trying so
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that's my update for today I hope you
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guys have a wonderful day wonderful
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weekend
